Chapter 21: Away From Me

(Song: Within Temptation - Enter)

Jacob tossed his briefcase on his desk, then slammed the door to his bedroom closed, a little harder than necessary. He couldn’t help it really, it had been a long, stressful day, yet he knew it wasn’t going to get any easier any time soon.

Ever since he and Bella had returned from their European summer vacation, trouble had been waiting for them as soon as they landed at the airport. Billy had somehow managed to wait until Jacob was home alone without Bella at his side to tell him the news about Vanessa. Then Jacob had the privilege of telling Bella what his father had told him because he just knew Charlie wasn’t going to do it.

Needless to say Bella wasn’t thrilled about finding out that Vanessa was back in town, firing question after question about what she was up to. Billy had tried to answer the questions as best he could, saying Vanessa was living with her parents while attending sessions with a psychiatrist once a week. The fact that Billy had proof that she was attending those sessions make Jacob and Bella relax a bit until Billy threw in the additional news that Vanessa was trying to gain full custody of her daughter, thus keeping her away from Riley.

That didn’t sit well with Bella at all. When she was alone with Jacob, she told him she was worried that Vanessa was doing that because she still believed the child was Jacob’s. Bella had a feeling if Vanessa won the custody battle, she was then going to try to get Jacob back so they could be the happy little family she imagined them to be.

For his part, Jacob did his best to reassure Bella that he didn’t think Vanessa would do that if she was getting help. Not only that, but Jacob was in love with Bella and nothing would change that fact. Still, as much as he seemed confident and sure on the outside, inside he was just as worried as Bella was, if not more.

The strain of trying to appear strong to Bella over the Vanessa issue while tackling the growing responsibilities of his job, coupled with the search for a new house was beginning to get to Jacob. Not to mention the fact that both his mother and Bella’s mother seemed hell bent on convincing them to start planning a wedding and setting a date. Jacob felt like he hadn’t smiled or relaxed since he had gotten off the plane upon returning from Europe.

The only time he seemed to relax was when he was with Bella, yet even those times were becoming few and far between. Not only was he so busy with the aforementioned things, but Bella was busy with her own job as well as talking to the real estate agent about the home they wanted to find soon. He knew she was also being pressured by Renee to plan a wedding because Renee was the most vocal about it, more so than his own mother was.

Sarah wanted her son to be happy with the woman he loved, but she wasn’t pushing and nagging as much as Renee was. Still, Jacob had a feeling the reason Renee was pushing so hard was because of Charlie’s mixed feelings about his daughter dating his best friend’s son, plus the threat of Vanessa loomed over all of them.

With a sigh, he changed out of his work clothes into a pair of basketball shorts and nothing else. Dragging his briefcase to his desk, he sat down to try to do a little more paperwork before dinner. He knew Bella was still working late, but she had told him that she would come over to have dinner with him at his house.

It was nearly an hour later when he heard his balcony door being opened. Glancing over his shoulder, he grinned at the sight of his fiancée’s huge smile as she sauntered into his room. Setting his work aside, he stood up then met her halfway with open arms and a hello kiss.

When she leaned back to look up at him, he chuckled. “Hello to you too!”

“Tell me your day was just as long and stressful as mine,” she begged.

He nodded. “Oh believe me, it was!”

Bella gave a weary sigh as her forehead dropped against his chest. He rubbed her back in soothing circles, trying to relax both of them at the same time. He smiled against her hair when he felt her arms tighten around his waist, knowing she was taking as much comfort and strength from being together as he was taking from her.

They remained that way for a few more needed moments before Bella leaned back to look up at him with a grin. “I know I’m going to regret this, but could you put a shirt on?”

He gave her his trademark smirk. “What? Does my being half naked really bother you that much?”

She rolled her eyes as she backed up towards the end of his bed. “See, I knew you’d have something to say about that!” Sitting down on the edge of the bed, she huffed, “If you must know, I love touching you, but if we’re going to have dinner with your parents then teasing me with your hotness will ensure that we won’t make it to dinner.”

He arched an eyebrow. “Is that a fact?”

She actually let her gaze travel down, then back up his body as if she were undressing him with her eyes before she winked at him. “That’s a promise.”

He groaned as he made his way over to his chest of drawers to find a shirt to put on. As he pulled the shirt out, he looked over his shoulder to find Bella still staring at his back, a lustful look on her face. “Not helping, Bells.”

She grinned at him. “Oh, you can tease, but I can’t? Tsk, tsk.”

He laughed as he pulled the shirt over his head before walking over to her. Leaning over her, he made her lean back on her elbows as his face was a breath away from hers. “Tease all you want, honey. Just remember that I’m gonna hold you to that promise.”

With those last words, he covered her lips with his, giving her a thorough ‘God, I missed you’ kiss. It soothed them both, yet at the same time left promises of more to come later. When he finally removed his lips from hers to sit next to her on the bed, she gave him a grateful smile even as he saw the passion in her gaze.

“Mm, I needed that,” she mumbled.

He returned her smile. “Yeah, me too.”

She sighed in contentment as she turned to take in his room. Her eyes eventually landed on his briefcase on his desk which she stared at as the passion and contentment began to disappear from her face. Jacob watched her until he knew she was thinking of something serious.

“Bella, honey? What’s on your mind?”

She sighed as she looked down at her hands. “You and I both know your dad is going to have something to update us with at dinner, Jacob.”

He nodded as he slid his hand into hers. “Yes, but it’s probably nothing new.”

She shrugged. “It might not be, but I’ll always worry about it. I know the first thing she’s going to do if she wins custody of her daughter is to try to get you back. She wants you to complete that perfect family she has in her head.”

Jacob sighed as he gave her hand a squeeze. “She can try all she wants, Bella. You know it won’t work, I’m in love with you.”

She turned to look into his eyes. “Jake, you know I believe you when you say that. I know you love me, I know you would never leave me like that, but this is Vanessa we’re talking about. Just because you made it clear that you chose me, she isn’t going to listen. She’s going to try to get you back regardless of what you want.”

He nodded. “I know, and she can try every trick she can come up with. Nothing she ever does will ever make me leave you.”

Bella closed her eyes and leaned her head against his shoulder. “I’m scared that you won’t be able to fight her. I’m scared that neither of us will survive whatever she has up her sleeve.”

Jacob wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close. He had the same fears as she did, but he was better at keeping them hidden. Sure, he’d told her that he shared her fears when they had talked about it before, but now he chose to simply give her his strength knowing they both needed it.

Still, deep down inside, Jacob knew Bella was right. No matter how much help Vanessa got from a psychiatrist, he still felt she was up to something that no one knew about. Whatever that something was, it had yet to be seen. But when it finally came to light, he had a feeling it wasn’t going to be pretty.

***************************************************
(Song: Mythos - Destiny)

Bella tried her best not to start pulling out her hair. She had been in the family den looking through more selections for a home, when her mother had once again accosted her, going on and on about planning a wedding for her and Jacob. No matter how many times she had tried to explain things to her mother, she was adamant that Bella should begin to choose colors and themes, but most importantly a date for the wedding.

She really wished her mother was more like Sarah, who had simply told Bella that she should just think of ideas for the future wedding, but a date wasn’t needed at this time. Sarah knew both Bella and Jacob wanted other things to settle first before they started trying to plan something as stressful as a wedding.

Even though Bella knew the reason why her mother was so adamant was because her father wasn’t too thrilled about her moving in with Jacob while they still weren’t married. Sure, they were engaged and the house they were looking for together was a part of their planning for their future together, but her father still worried about his only daughter leaving the nest for the first time.

Bella knew without asking that Charlie was constantly lighting a fire beneath Renee to convince her to marry Jacob, preferably before they moved in together. It wasn’t because he didn’t think a couple should be together before getting married, he was just being a dad as usual. He knew he could be construed as a hypocrite because of the events that let to his own marriage, but it didn’t stop him from trying to get his daughter hitched before she moved out of his house.

Still, Bella was tired of listening to her mother’s constant chatter about the wedding.

“Mom! Can you just stop and breathe for a moment? Really, we’ve been over this so many times already!”

Renee pursed her lips. “Well, I know that, but you haven’t been listening to me.”

Bella refused to roll her eyes again. “Yes I have, but I feel like you haven’t been listening to me.”

Renee was about to respond to that but the chime of the doorbell sounded through the house. She grinned at Bella before hurrying away. “Be right back, sweetheart.”

Bella was almost thankful that her mother had been interrupted by the door until her mother walked back into the room with Sarah on her heels. Suddenly she felt like she was about to be double-teamed and she didn’t like it one bit.

Eyeing her cell phone, she debated on calling Jacob to come back her up until Sarah sat down next to her.

“Honey, I’ve been talking to a contact of mine for a few weeks and we’ve found something that I think both you and Jacob will like. I was hoping he’d be here for this, but when I asked him to meet us here, he said he couldn’t get out of his meeting.”

Bella sighed. Great, so they couldn’t get Jacob, now she was the one who was going to have to deal with them. “Sarah, you know Jacob and I already have things planned out…”

Sarah nodded her head. “Yes, but this isn’t about the wedding.”

“Not really,” added Renee.

Bella narrowed her eyes at her mother before she looked back at Sarah. “Okay, what have you found?”

Sarah reached into her purse and pulled out a file folder, setting it on the table in front of Bella. Trying not to squirm over what she thought the contents were, she hesitantly opened the folder only to widen her eyes in amazement.

She began to flip through the papers in the file, briefly scanning all the information and pictures included within. Still, Renee couldn’t keep in her excitement so she finally blurted, “Well? What do you think?”

Bella blinked as she looked up at Sarah. “Where did you find this?”

Sarah gave her a gentle smile. “It was my contact in Real Estate that found it. She’s an old friend of mine and when I told her what you and Jacob were looking for, she began sending me selections that she thought you two would like. I saw this and immediately thought it would be perfect for the two of you. I showed it to Billy too and he agrees.”

“So do I!” piped up Renee. “And your father too. Although he’s still insisting you get married first, but never mind that! So? Do you like it?”

Bella couldn’t help the smile that spread over her face. “It looks lovely on paper, but…”

“But you want to see it to make sure it has what you and Jacob want,” finished Sarah with a nod. “That’s why I was trying to convince Jacob to meet us here, that way I can take both of you to see the house.”

Bella nodded her head in understanding as Sarah continued. “If you and Jacob like this house, it’ll be one less thing for you two to stress over. After that, Renee and I just want to consult with you on what you would like your dream wedding to be. We don’t have to make appointments or plan deadlines, just gather some ideas.”

She reached out to squeeze Bella’s hand. “Nothing is set in stone, honey. You two can get married a year from now, or two or three. It doesn’t matter, but it doesn’t hurt to start thinking about what you like. I personally think it’s nicer to slowly plan your wedding than waiting until the last minute to try to throw something together.”

Bella had to agree with Sarah there. She remembered the headache and complaints Sarah had when trying to create the wedding for Vanessa and Jacob. Thank goodness it never came to fruition though. Sarah had been relieved, not just because she didn’t feel rushed anymore, but also because she knew that Jacob marrying that girl had been all wrong in the first place.

Bella ran her finger over the picture of the house before nodding. “Let me call Jacob, I’ll get him here so we can go look at it.”

Renee clapped her hands with glee as Sarah stood up and said, “Why don’t you just ask him to meet you outside the building in twenty minutes? We’ll swing by the real estate office to pick up my friend before we pick him up and head directly to the house.”

They all agreed on a plan of action before Bella picked up her phone, feeling lighter than she had in days.

***********************************************
(Song: Nightwish - Bare Grace Misery)

A few days later Jacob knew it couldn’t be a coincidence when he ran into Vanessa as he was walking out of the coffee shop. He had stopped by to fill up on coffee since he needed the caffeine to compensate for the lack of sleep he had gotten the night before. He and Bella had just agreed to let their parents put a down payment on a new home for them, so of course Vanessa had to show up to throw a wrench into his semi-happiness.

He had been too engrossed in downing half of his coffee when he heard his name called out in the high, grating voice he had come to hate most in the world.

“Oh Jacob? Is that you?”

He cringed as he felt that voice travel down his spine like nails on a chalkboard. Hoping he could still get away, he kept right on walking as if he hadn’t heard a thing. Unfortunately, Vanessa stepped into his path and grinned up at him.

“It is you! How have you been, Jacob?”

The coffee he had just drank was threatening to come back up at the fake happiness he could see on Vanessa’s face. He swallowed thickly before answering her. “I’m good. How about you?”

She sighed in mock suffering. “As well as I can be, I guess. It’s been tough raising my daughter on my own even with the recent help from my parents.”

He nodded. “Right, I heard you moved back in with your parents.”

She shrugged. “It’s all I can afford right now while I try to get my life in order.”

Jacob nodded again, unsure what else to do. He was about to say he needed to get going, but Vanessa continued on.

“I’m not with Riley anymore, did you know that? He’s just not the kind of man I want as a father for my daughter even if he thinks he is.”

“Really? Well that’s a shame,” answered Jacob.

“He just doesn’t understand no matter how many times we’ve talked about it. So now he has the nerve to try to take her away from me! That’s why I’m staying with my parents. They’re helping me to get full custody of my daughter so Riley can’t get his hands on her.”

“Well, I wish you the best, now if you’ll excuse me…”

“Jacob, there’s something else too. I’m…I’m seeing a shrink.”

He went still as he stared down at her in shock. He honestly didn’t think she would tell him that, so when she did he was silent.

“I know I’ve been…acting strangely, but I’m getting better and I’m trying to get my life back in order too.”

“Um, well that’s great, then.” He paused wondering if he should go on. “I hope you do and I wish you the best.”

She gave him a slight smile, “Thanks. The doctor says I’m doing good so far, so that makes me feel better. I just want things to work out for my daughter, you see. So if I can fix my life to benefit her, then it’ll all be worth it in the end.”

Jacob shifted his feet as he nodded. “I’m glad you’re focused on your daughter. Her care is important.” Again he paused as he looked at his watch before saying, “Good luck to you, Vanessa. I’ve…”

“Jacob?” She asked, “I was wondering, would you like to meet her? I know you’ll like her.”

Jacob cringed, he knew what was coming. “Vanessa…”

“Please?” she interrupted, “You really will like her. She reminds me of you so much! She even has your smile!”

“My smile? But…”

Vanessa was now rambling on, ignoring anything he was trying to say. “I know Riley keeps thinking that he has a right to her, but he doesn’t have as much of a right as you do, Jacob! I swear, she looks so much like you! You have to see her! I know you’ll believe me once you do!”

“We’ve been over this, Vanessa,” he hedged.

“I know you don’t want me right now and I don’t blame you, Jacob. I know I need help. Just give me some time to get better and I promise it’ll work out for us. In the meantime, please say you’ll be a part of our daughter’s life. She really needs you.”

Jacob sighed. “Look…”

“I know what the tests said Jacob, but I swear they lied! Just come see her! You’ll see! We belong together as a family!”

Jacob took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. Staring at her, he waited until she got quiet before looking her dead in the eye. “Vanessa listen, right now my life is a bit busy and chaotic for me to have any free time at all. How about we wait on this? You keep getting better and I’ll come see you as soon as my life calms down a little, okay?”

Vanessa blinked, looking away for a few moments before turning to give him a warm smile. “I’m sorry. I’m keeping you from your job, aren’t I? It’s okay Jacob, sometimes my mind still runs away with me, so I apologize. Um, just…just forget what I just rambled on about, okay? It was so good to see you again though. You take care and maybe we’ll see each other around, right?”

Jacob tried not to look surprised at the sudden turnabout Vanessa just did. He couldn’t tell if she had really gone from sane, to insane then back again in the last few moments. Her switching back and forth was giving him whiplash. Still, he knew that it was safer to take the out while it was provided.

“Right, it was good to see you too. Good luck with everything, okay?”

She nodded. “Thanks. See you around.”

When she stepped out of his way, he mumbled a “see you,” before hightailing it to his car. Not once did he look back, which meant he missed the calculating look on Vanessa’s face.

****************************************************
(Song: Evanescence -  Away From Me)

“I’ve woken now to find myself in the shadows of the lie I’ve created. I’m longing to be lost in you. Won’t you take me away from me.”

Bella sighed in pleasure as Jacob’s lips left trails of goosebumps along her skin while his warm hands teased and plumped her breasts. She could feel his hot, moist breaths along her skin, matching the rhythm of his thrusts inside of her.

Her own hands weren’t idle as she alternated between clinging to his shoulders or trailing her nails over the smooth muscles of his back. Even her staccato breathing matched his as her hips rose to meet his in the ever-familiar dance they performed when lost in their passion for each other.

When she had first arrived to his room by way of the trusty balcony, he had seemed worried about something. Throughout the rest of that evening as they talked or worked on their own paperwork, she knew his mind had been miles away from where they were. When she had tried to ask him if anything was wrong, he had responded with a half-hearted ‘just tired’ before returning to whatever he had been doing.

She had decided not to push the issue, knowing Jacob would talk to her when he was ready. But as it got later into the night, Jacob seemed to come out of his funk, then proceeded to seduce her out of her clothes.

Not that she ever had a problem with that.

Now, he seemed to be single-mindedly focused on making her feel good in his arms, just as her love was undoubtedly making him feel good too, judging by the sounds he was making against her skin.

He wrapped his arms tighter around her torso, bringing her body flush with his as he angled his hips to go even deeper. She moaned his name as her fingers dug into his behind, encouraging him to go even faster and harder than he already was. She dug her heels into the backs of his thighs, holding on for dear life until moments later she threw her head back with a soft cry.

Jacob could feel the waves of her ecstasy surrounding him as he continued to move deep inside of her. Her walls seized him tightly, as if letting him know she would never let him go. Losing himself in the feel of her warmth around him and her passionate cries, he let himself go. His body answered hers, his own climax mixing with hers as she continued to cradle him within her body.

What seemed like hours was only minutes when he finally seemed to come back to himself, finding his face buried in Bella’s neck while his body lay heavily over hers. She wasn’t complaining even though he was sure his heavy weight had to be smothering her. Taking another deep breath, he slowly lifted himself up but dipped his head to give her a soft, slow kiss before moving his body to lay next to hers.

He felt her sigh as she rolled onto her side to face him, but his eyes were closed as he relished the last of the euphoria that their lovemaking had created. Drowsiness was fast catching up with him when he felt her fingers lightly trailing over his brow, even as her whispered words penetrated his hazy brain.

“Jake?”

“Hm?” he replied. When she didn’t say anything else, he opened his eyes to see her giving him a worried look.

“Are you okay now?”

He wrapped an arm around her waist, bringing her body into his. He kissed her forehead before murmuring against her skin. “I’m fine. Just need some sleep and I’ll be all better in the morning. Good night, honey.”

She was silent as he pulled the covers over their cooling bodies, settling them into the bed. When he wrapped his arms around her and closed his eyes, he finally heard her response. “Night, Jacob. I love you.”

She kissed his cheek, then settled against his chest. He mumbled an “I love you too” then lay there as he felt her body relaxing and her breathing becoming even.

Long after Bella had fallen asleep, Jacob was still awake. Opening his eyes to stare into the darkness, the encounter with Vanessa floated to the forefront of his mind from where it had been lurking all day long. No matter what he had done, he hadn’t been able to erase the memory of their conversation.

He knew Bella could tell something was bothering him, but he didn’t want to tell her what had happened. She was so happy with the fact that they had finally found the perfect house for themselves, plus she seemed happy with the plan their mothers had come up with for planning their wedding. The last thing he wanted to do was let Vanessa ruin Bella’s good mood.

No, this time, even though he had let his father know about the encounter, he refused to tell Bella about it. This time he wanted her to keep that smile on her face. The one that lit her up from the inside until it shone through her lovely brown eyes. This time he wanted to continue to put on his confident face for her, to be strong and reassuring, not allowing anything to worry her like before.


With those thoughts, Jacob closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of his fiancée, promising himself that this time he wouldn’t allow the mistake that was Vanessa come between them again.